Archive for March, 2006

things become more complex when you can’t find yourself

Friday, March 31st, 2006
crashing
blindness
Where am I?
here!
I have lost track… of time
minutes may have gone by
and I am lost to you
shaking
frothing
muttering
Who is this person?
Surely, it can’t be me?
I am safe.
Safe in my shell
of blackness
forgetfullness
return to this world
but I am afraid
I don’t know how to handle
these new complexities

a mind is a rare and precious thing to waste

Tuesday, March 28th, 2006

teeth clench, head aches
I do not know who I am anymore
remembering, it becomes harder
thinking, it hurts too much

I feel so old

too much to do, too little energy to do it
so many expectations
everyone needs something
I just need to feel normal

just want to stop hurting so much

day closes as night begins
and I am greatful for the darkness

I am still alive… sort of.

Tuesday, March 28th, 2006

I’ve been transfering all of my blogger posts over to this site for all of my blogs. So far I have finished with all of the other blogs (except for the vap evaluations). However, my personal blogger one still has 90 posts on it, and I have to transfer all of them by hand! With life being the way it is and I’ve been quite out of my mind this year… job interviews, finding out that I’m epileptic, Jack turning one (yippee!) having to rely on Jeff for rides… blah blah blah. I really haven’t had the time that I would like to dedicate to my blog, even though it should be cathartic or something. Plus I’ve got a cold right now and I haven’t really even had the energy to eat or anything, let alone write. I’ve hardly had the time or energy to look at my favorite blog WATAT!

Well anyway, I’m alive and sort of well. And if you’d really like to know, most of my time has been consumed with:
GN for Librarians

which is a blog that I created to use in a presentation that I and another librarian Jason are doing for fellow j librarians. It seems to have morphed into a mess of links and articles and what not. I’ve only had a chance to write a couple of reviews but I need to write some more before April 12, so that it looks more fleshed out.

I also need to read the book Beauty, which I haven’t started yet, for my teen book discussion on Saturday.

Oh and Jack’s first birthday party is on Sunday afternoon.

Yes, and finally my brain has imploded thank you very much.